We’re Strictly Ballroom

My next post is going to be full of Cailie Poems, I swear. But for now, you get whats on my mind.

Sometimes I wish that my thoughts would just leave me alone for awhile. I wish that I could just get my shit done without doubting myself, wondering if what Im doing is right, if there could be a better way. Zoneing out,  I wish that all this drama about moving and landlords and credit checks and stubborn roommates and teachers and the end of the semester and work and everything could just fix themselves without me having to worry about it. I wish.

I wish that I could love my job again. I wish that the deafining silence given to me was broken, that this falseified scarlet letter would be removed from my name. I didnt even sleep with anyone and it feels like Im getting the bad reputation, without actually having to do anything to achive it.

This summer is going to be epic though. Im going on a short tour selling merch for a friends band, Im going squatting in Sacramento and plan on seeing some good friends and great bands while Im there. Just me and my bike and a backpack full of everything I need for the week and a half I am gone. That same trip I will be couch surfing in Davis seeing all the friends I havent seen in far to long and catching up. I will also be spending a week in the east coast with friends who are more like family. There is a lot to look forward to, I just have to get through all this busniessy/bullshitty(hey! New word!) stuff before the fun can happen.

In other news I have gotten really into moldmaking lately and spendin an unhealthy amount of time at Douglass and Sturgess. I also have a big quiz on thursday (the day that I move…I hope) and If I dont rock ass on my zoology final, well, Im fucked.

ah stress, you complete me.